Beware of Churnito Norris

Before you get all excited about taking over the Universe with your online course, it’s important to understand the 1001 ways that same Universe will conspire to kill your business.

Out of almost a near infinite dumb ways to die, the greatest threat, the most ominous silent killer of all startups is called “churn“.

Say Hi to Mr. Churnito Norris.

Mr. Churnito wants to kill you, slowly… but surely.

Churnito is the reason why even the fastest growing startups crash and burn.

Do you want to know how Churnito does his evil?

I’m sure you do… in fact, you BETTER do or… kaput.

Churnito wants to bleed you of your most precious asset – your subscribers.

Every time one of your users or subscribers stops using your product or unsubscribes from your list, Churnito scores a point and you die a little.

Churnito Will Never Go Away

Here is the bad news. Churnito will never go away (I know, fooking Churnito, uh?)

The good news? Once you know how Churnito operates, you can minimize its harm.

Churnito is relentlessly working 24/7 trying to lure your dear subscribers away from you.

You have two ways to win against Churnito Norris.

One: Get more subscribers faster than Churnito takes them away from you.

Two: Treat your existing subscribers so well that they never want to leave you, no matter how hard Churnito tries to lure them into hitting the damn unsubscribe button.

Most companies and humans put all their effort into One. Getting more, and more subscribers.

But once they get that subscriber, they neglect them, they continuously pitch them crap, buy my crapola, buy, buy… BUY!

These companies and humans forget that behind every subscriber, behind every email, there is a beating heart with feelings, emotions, and aspirations.

These companies and humans forget that when you meet someone for the first time, it takes time to build trust, to build a relationship. And all great relationships start by giving – not by asking.

These companies and humans forget that it’s 5 times harder to get a new user to buy than a happy old user to buy again from you.

To win the war against Churnito is not that hard. All you need is to treat your subscribers as your family.

Care for them, help them… love them.

Churnito makes gagging noises when he hears the word love. Love is Churnito’s kryptonite.

The Beatles were right, yet again…

All you need is love.

Peace, love, and Churnito-R.I.P cookies.


P.S: What is your Churnito rate? Did you know if you lose 8% of your subscribers every month, in one year you’ll have zero left? Do you want me to make an animation bringing Mr. Churnito alive?

P.2: Next two weeks I’ll be exploring Iceland with the most beautiful woman in the history of human kind (aka my wife). Yes. I’ll still be competing in the very course creation challenge I launched 😉

P.3: Talking about the challenge. 97 people submitted their first assignment! How many people will make it all the way to the end? or will Mr. Churnito take them all way before the last week and I’ll be awarding myself my own completion prizes?


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